And I think including them is important rather than just telling them, “Fido went to a farm.”
This week has gone by in a flash and I can hardly believe that Tuesday as come already. It has come because today is actually tomorrow as I’ve been blogging one day behind each day’s events. By the time you read tomorrow’s blog Diesel will have already crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.
I feel my own tension build as I write these words, I so wish there was something I could do to save this family from their sorrow. I wish I could magically make Diesel young and vibrant again, make him last for many more years.
As I read through Jennifer’s musings for Monday I felt a strange calmness in her words. Not calm in a way of resignation but a calmness that comes from knowing you’ve done everything possible and now all there is left to do is wait.
"Monday - There are many purposes in life - one is to be happy, you've been my guide to happiness this week, Diesel.
To live simply so others might simply live, to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all...
...to not try to see through each other as often as we should try to see each other through.
|~ no words you ever needed, Diesel,|
because your life was your message ~
Gage filled it with blue pebbles and seashells and a wing so you can fly and see the ocean and run on the beach.
We let you see it, sniff it, taste it, drool a little on it - so you'll be familiar with it.
Today we lit it so you could know what it looks like so when Gage feels he misses you or wants to tell you about his day he can light this candle and you will be able to find your way to him.
(in case we ever move, he grows up and you don't recognize him, it's night time, it's cold, or he forgot to tell you something... all bases are covered Diesel)
Before he blew it out, he closed his eyes and made a wish for your journey tomorrow.
Tomorrow is the day we let you continue on your journey, Diesel... and while we all want to be present with you in that moment just before you turn to bound across that Rainbow Bridge - ears flopping and tongue wagging - if one of us cannot... if one of our hearts just cannot bear to watch you go, then we want to take comfort that our words, the ones we would whisper so your soul could hear, are carried with you - close to your heart.
|Our "Wish Bone" For You is Filled With Love.|
Your wish bone is beautiful - inside and out.
White sparkly felt fabric, that shines and twinkles just like you, is what Alyssa chose to make the bone. With her pencil and scissors, she cut each piece and then stitched them all together by hand.
things that make me different|
are the things that make me.
Inside the bone is where we will place our wishes for you, Diesel, written with love and kisses. When you have crossed the bridge and found a lush green meadow, rest yourself beneath a shady willow tree and enjoy the peace and happiness...
...in exchange for your collar you leave us on earth, we will tie your wish bone around your neck with a special ribbon.
unbroken wish bone represents|
wishes and dreams and desires fulfilled.
On your collar we added a wish bone... we will keep your collar and the wish bone and will tell everyone your name, and that we were blessed to have you live in our home and how very, very much we loved you.
You are so much sunshine in every square inch you have been like a kiss from the angels and we are forever richer for being loved by you.
You have told us a thousand times over that we are your reason for being; by the way you rest your paw in our hand; by the way you thump your tail at our laughter; by the way you use "the face" and show you’re hurt when we leave without taking you. When we are wrong, you are delighted to forgive. When we are upset, you clown around to make us smile. When we are happy, you are absolute joy unbounded. You are loyalty itself. You have taught us the meaning of devotion. With you, we know a secret comfort and a private peace. You have brought us to a place of understanding we have never been before. Your head on our lap can heal our human hurts. Your presence by our side is protection against fears of dark and unknown things. You promised to wait for us… whenever… wherever – in case we need you. We would always need you - like sunshine, happiness, rainbows..."
And now for something really special! When I first watched this video on Jennifer's Facebook wall I thought it was a random video the family had found on YouTube or something. Instead this is actually Alyssa herself singing for Diesel. Or rather singing on behalf of Diesel. The caption below is what Jennifer wrote under the video.
This is how Alyssa chose to cope with Diesel's day looming so close.
"...when you're at the point when you don't understand why she won't leave her room or get off her iPhone last night when it's getting really late... she has an absolute melt down after you take her phone away for the evening and you remind her, with hugs, that we are all trying to deal with Diesel and our advice to her is to just try again tomorrow at whatever it is she is so hyper focused on... then she posts this - and I don't know what else to tell her other than, from every corner of my soul, I am glad you didn't give up because it is beautiful, Alyssa, just beautiful."